Entering group therapy can be an anxiety provoking experience, especially for those who bring interpersonal patterns that collide with getting their needs met.

 Being in a safe, functioning environment where the expectation is to share your feelings and to get your needs met by asking, brings negative thought patterns to the forefront where they can be addressed.

Some examples of these negative thought patterns:

• I don’t deserve to get what I want or need.
• It doesn’t really make any difference; I really don’t care.
• I should be willing to sacrifice my own needs for others.
• Being emotional means being out of control.
• Letting others know that I am feeling bad is weakness.
• I don’t want to hurt anyone.

Hearing a peer in group therapy share thoughts similar to one’s own pattern of thinking allows the individual in treatment to see how common disordered thought patterns can be separate from their own sense of self. For example, a group member may see the personal qualities of a peer and see how that peer’s perception of self is affected by eating disorder thoughts patterns.

This awareness, along with advice offered to peers, often leads the individual to conclude, “I need to be willing to follow my own good advice.”

Healthy boundaries around emotional and behavioral responsibility are developed. These new experiences support the individual’s ability to change their interpersonal patterns and develop new ways of interacting with others.

Some examples of changing thought patterns:

• My wants and needs are important.
• I really do care, about myself and others.
• When I take care of myself, I have more to give to others.
• Sharing emotions is part of developing intimacy in relationships.
• Letting others know how I am feeling is investing trust in our relationship.
• Being a compassionate person means I am sensitive to how others are feeling but I am not responsible for how they feel.

Many new participants who were initially anxious about group therapy find a sense of safety and support within this environment. It is a place where secret thoughts and behaviors are shared and a sense of understanding and acceptance is discovered. Not only is the diagnosis of illness shared, but the need and the ability to change thoughts and behaviors.

Many within the first few days of treatment in the group therapy model will say, “It is such a relief to know that I am not alone.”